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My ministers inquire regarding my actions, curious as to the origins of my behavior and the thoughts that precipitated them. What has me be blinded to my own truth – in denial (Don’t Even Know I am Lying) of my barbarous attitude and position?
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My Ministers
Sometimes,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], though, in the company of my enemies I retreat,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], hide and disappear into a myriad of disguises to protect myself from harm and from looking bad. I may throw stones from behind a barrier and pretend it’s not me at all who is engaged in warfare. I disown my anger, my feelings of righteousness and indignation. “It wasn’t me!” I exclaim with defensiveness and contempt for having been accused unjustly.
I ask myself – what is considered right? What is considered wrong? Who is responsible for the woes of the world? My ministers smile and with their eyes they inquire into my soul’s wisdom for what is true; and I then, for that moment comprehend that I am an accomplice in all acts of violence on the planet. Only by recognizing the seed of vengeance within me I’m able to receive the gifts of freedom from my enemy.
Ministers are also my teachers,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], my coaches and counselors. They are my thinking partners, who also reflect back to me,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], through deep listening and questioning,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], how aligned I am with my highest truths and how I may be ignoring or distracting myself from the ways I’ve contributed to the very violence I hate in my adversaries. These wise beings bring my attention to the learnings so available for me by embracing the enemy as my long lost lover.
Author's Bio:
What I know is that my enemies are my best teachers. They reflect what I most hate in the world and most likely (like about 100%) they reflect aspects of myself that I do not wish to acknowledge or own. When my enemies are around, I have no doubt,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I have something to learn.
The Dilemma
My Enemies
I’ll tell you right now,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I hate the thought of giving up my armor of righteousness and entitlement, because I feel safe, powerful and in control when I can wield them with stealth accuracy. Without them, I believe myself to be defenseless, exposed and vulnerable.
Through deep discernment and with the support and empowering nature of my ministers am I able to choose to choose to see myself and my enemies differently. Through the annihilation of my own pretence and the shattering of the barriers of them vs. us,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], am I truly allowed to realize I am my brother/sister’s keeper, and they are mine.
My enemies infuse me with intense emotions – rage, hatred, vile condemnation and contempt. Judgments are automatic, so much so I don’t even know that I’m judging. How I respond, more often than not is a knee jerk reaction. I’m inflamed and my actions inflammatory. I want to violate them as they have violated me based on my sense of what’s right and wrong,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], good and bad. I want to wipe them off the planet so that I can live peacefully. However …
Many of us love to hate! It makes us feel good to think violent thoughts and even go to war for what we believe to be right and true. How can we get even, or better yet, how can we be victorious? What if I consider the possibility that my enemies are gifts? What would that mean – what are the consequences of such a consideration?
The dilemma as a choice-point shifts when I choose to honor my highest truth and risk losing my attachments, my position, my identity – perhaps even life itself for something much larger than me. I’m working on it!
I woke up from a dream this morning that made me question: “Really?” It was only the last few seconds of the dream that seemed so profound. It was a children’s choir – all boys, and they were singing a Christmas song. The only lyric I heard was: “Gift me with my enemies and my ministers.” This is a pretty profound phrase,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], especially for a group of youngsters to be singing as a Christmas song.
We need our adversaries – our enemies to confront us. They bring out the worst in us and provide opportunities for us to truly reflect on the importance, value and priorities of our hierarchy of desires. We need our ministers, counselors, therapists and coaches to reflect what gifts are available for us by engaging with our enemies.
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April 21st, in Holland Amsterdam near the train collision accident scene, police and rescue workers are busy tension. On the same day, two train collision in Holland near Amsterdam.

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International auto shipping to Australia would require that you have the original passport, original car registration certificate which clearly bears your name,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and Carnet de Passages de Douanes from your original country. For more details on car shipping to Australia,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it would be a great idea to hire the services of international auto shipping company.
When car shipping to Qatar, you should make sure that the model of your car is at least three years old. The customs authorities will not be allowed if your car model is older than three years old. If you are the car owner, then you should be resident of Qatar before the registration of car has been done. There is no customs duty charged if the car is imported for personal use. Some of the other relevant documentation that needs to be shown to the customs would include car insurance policy, registration certificate of the car,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], proof of the ownership of the car, and the original import manifest of the car.
Specific points on Car Shipping to Qatar
Author's Bio:
Are you serious to know about the facts behind car shipping to Qatar or Australia? Do you have the details of procedures which are followed during the transfer of car from your country to Qatar? International auto shipping is indeed a complex activity and you need to have a good idea about it. If you do not have the time to skim through the details of international auto shipping,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it would be a good idea to at least have the basics worked correctly and the leave rest to the international auto shipping company. By all means and intents,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], when you are planning to ship your car to Qatar or Australia, the very first thing that should strike your mind is customs policies.
The international auto shipping company will require a notary copy of the title. In fact it would work in your interests if you can provide the front and the back of notarized copy to the car shipping company. Do not forge the documents or pass on any piece of wring information as this would not lead you anywhere. The customs policies in Qatar and Australia are quite stringent and in case of any discrepancies found in the shipping documentation,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], your car will be confiscated or you may have to pay high customs duty.
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It is quite natural to think in terms of customs policies and protocols followed for the purpose of car shipping to Qatar or car shipping to Australia. As a generic rule when you are transferring your car to Australia or Qatar,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is very necessary that the international auto shipping company should clearly mention in the shipping document the details about year,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], make and model of vehicle, License plate and VIN number,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Full payment,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], prior to the pick up of the vehicle, bill of sale of the vehicle, name,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], mailing address,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and telephone numbers, original title, as well as the name, mailing address, and telephone numbers of the consignee in the Qatar or Australia where the car or any vehicle for that matter is being shipped.
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Qilu network March 31st news reporter from the Shandong provincial government information office, 2009 year Shandong tax hundred enterprises list formally announced this morning.

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Be sure to design a application distribution channel that ensures maximum reach and scalability in the long run to cater to as many users as possible for enhanced experiences.
3. Another major user demand that needs to be catered to is offering them the same experience on much smaller and varying screen sizes. Developers are expected to reinvent conventional design rules and create dynamic applications that do not compromise on the user experience.
Mobile Application Development Company is looking to satisfying needs of target audiences who simply demand positive user experiences. Whether they are checking their emails, tracking sport scores, weather forecasts or spending time on social networking applications, the challenge is to provide a native look and feel that is almost synonymous to its browser based portal and offers the same experience overall.
A major opportunity that mobile application development presents to developers is the easy integration of voice, location tracking,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], video, messaging and data services in ways that are simply not feasible on the desktops.
4,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Users tend to get very excited over applications which leverage smart phone hardware such as motion detectors and cameras. Application designs that are able to make good use of these features are able to enhance experiences to unimaginable extents.
5. It is almost a given that if your application is offering voice and messaging services,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], there should be seamless integration of these tools through top-notch speech processing technologies.
6. An added feature in any application that is always a welcome one, is the easy localization of tools which further allow implementation of payment gateways,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], downloads etc.
2. It is crucial for developers to create applications which work on minimal battery power and bandwidth, since this plays a crucial role in defining overall user experience.
The User – Developer Relationship
With over two million smart phones and tablets sold around the world,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is said that by the end of this year,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], there will be more mobile devices than people on this planet. There is no arguing to the fact that the world is turning mobile; but at the same time, this also brings with it its own set of opportunities and challenges with respect to the growing need to develop mobile based software solutions.
1,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Easy accessibility means that users no longer need to depend on multiple hardware devices to access the same applications. This becomes challenging for Mobile application development company who are expected to create experiences that are supported by as many types of mobile devices and operating systems as possible,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
The Opportunity
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The Challenge
Author&#039,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];s Bio:&nbsp,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];
Mobile application Development Company cannot overlook the revolution that has come about in software distribution channels which conventionally only revolved around sharing ring-tones and image files. It is now possible for developers to upload applications to mobile stores across operating systems,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and even focus on creating high-end applications which may appeal to only a certain demographic. For example,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], one might assume that a user of a High-end iPhone 4S may have different demands out of the applications as against a user of a low-cost Android based smart phone.
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Control. As a freelancer you have to please your boss or your client. You don't usually make strategic decisions and you rely on other people to give you direction. As an employee you can become the boss and control your future.

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I challenge you to place your birth certiﬁcate and your “Why” card in a place so that you can see them everyday,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. This will serve as a reminder of the two most important days in your life.
A great friend of mine once said “The two most important days of your life are the day you that were born and the day that you Find Your WHY”. Right now you need to look inside and ask yourself a real serious question,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], “Have I found my WHY?” You were already born,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and you really had no real say over what happened that day. You did not decide to be born. You are here because you are an individual miracle of God,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but “Finding Your Why” is up to you and only you.
We all participate in “Body Washing” everyday,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but so few people spend the same amount of time cleaning their brain from all the negative “Non-Why” people and things in the world. The sad part is that the spiritual dirt that builds up in your brain is 1000 times worse for you than physical dirt. You must wash your brain with positive,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], motivational material on a daily basis in order to stay on track to achieving your Why.
Find Your Why Now,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]!
John Di Lemme
Author's Bio:&nbsp,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];
By John Di Lemme
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Take a look around. You know when someone has found their WHY in life,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], because they know exactly where they are going and what their ultimate mission is. They are the people who striving forward even when it is cloudy or cold outside, because the outside factors do not determine their inside WHY! As soon as you “Find Your WHY”,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you will become a completely empowered person going in a constant direction each day -- UPWARD! Will it be easy? No. People and things will stand in the way of you achieving your WHY. That’s why I am a true believer in “Brainwashing”.
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Some people who are normally colorful in conversation find their delivery skills lacking in expression. And then there are those who lack color both in conversation and at the lectern.

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Sometimes you may have to resort to some other measures to overcome obstacles. Here a few simple yet powerful techniques to assist you in developing mental strength
Many times it’s our “good indented” friends,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], colleagues and family members who foster the seed of doubts by trying to talk you out of changing your path. It is when you decide to make a better life for yourself that your decision will be met by all kinds of cautious warnings.
The Universe presents you with these challenges in order to learn to how to develop mental strength, grow stronger and more confident in yourself.
This means,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you need to stand up to your obstacles and not just believe you can overcome them,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but take action AND overcome them! When you attack your obstacles head-on and do something, you'll find that they will simply evaporate. Heck, you might even have some fun at the same time.
You can only allow other people to put obstacles in your path, you either accept them or not, it’s totally up to you. Learn how to develop mental strength by standing up to the challenges without complaining. Have the mental strength to change your thoughts and beliefs that you can succeed and you will.
To succeed at overcoming obstacles you need to have the mental strength to stick through any adversity,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], if you truly believe in your goal. You must see things through; to have the mental strength to believe more in yourself than in the obstacles and to have the willingness to do what it takes to turn the obstacles around.
Action Steps:
1.See obstacles as a learning to move you forward, fail forward fast!
By Gregg Swanson
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Your beliefs, thoughts and feelings are the foundation on which you build your mental strength, hence your success. A solid house can't built on a foundation of shifting sand,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or a compose pile. The same applies to achieving success by using mental strength.
If your beliefs that lead to your thoughts are shaky,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], scattered and uncontrolled,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], they will creates internal obstacles that will hold you back unless you destroy them.
4. Develop the ability to overcome,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], bypass,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or eliminate obstacles.
5. When difficult circumstances arise, take massive and immediate action.
Standing up to and conquering your obstacles develops the mental strength within you and creates sense of accomplishment that reinforces the sense of your inner power. By developing a habit mental strength, you instill into your psyche a strong message of endurance and success. This strengthens the belief in yourself and what you can accomplish.
3. Confront obstacles as habits of success (and not of failure.)
Take the bull by the horn and address the challenge head-on. This might be challenging at first, particularly if you are not used to confrontation. Yet the more you do it, the easier it will become.
Ask yourself if the obstacle can be ignored. Your fixation of the problem only renders it more cumbersome. If possible,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], stop paying attention to it. Remember, energy flows where attention goes and results show.
People will tell you "That sounds great, but do you have any idea how much that will cost you or how long it'll take to get the kind of result you want?" Or,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], “What makes you think YOU can do that?” Or, “Why in the world do you want to change? Just put in your time and be happy.” Or the big one…"What will happen if . . .?"
2. Repeat loudly as often as necessary to yourself: "I have overcome this", or “This to shall pass.”
Use humor to neutralize obstacle. This helps to diffuse the tension around the issue.
Regardless of who and where this “advice come from, they only serve to increase your level of anxiety and self doubts. The best way to handle such opinions is to say what my good friend T. Harv Eker says, “Thanks for sharing” and then immediately forget what they said.
Learning to handle obstacles is the best way to stand your ground and succeed,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. While listening or running away only serves to undermines your self esteem.
How to Achieve Mental Strength by Destroying Inner Obstacles
Let’s take a short trip. Close your eyes…well not now, first read the next paragraph. Close your eyes and remember a time in your life when you felt inspired and excited to make a significant change. What happened? Did you go for it or did your inner obstacles get in the way?
Author's Bio:
Contemplation:
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Some people who are normally colorful in conversation find their delivery skills lacking in expression. And then there are those who lack color both in conversation and at the lectern.

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2. Cognitivism
2) Operant conditioning where there is reinforcement of the behavior by a reward or a punishment.
There are two types of possible conditioning:
Behaviorism focuses only on the objectively observable aspects of learning and discounts the internal processing that might be associated with the activity. Learning is the acquisition of new behavior through conditioning.
4. Informal and post-modern theories
In psychology and education, learning theories are attempts to describe how people and animals learn, thereby helping us understand the inherently complex process of learning. There are three main categories (philosophical frameworks) under which learning theories fall: behaviorism, cognitivism, and constructivism.
Informal theories of education deal with more practical breakdown of the learning process. One of these deals with whether learning should take place as a building of concepts toward an overall idea, or the understanding of the overall idea with the details filled in later. Modern thinkers favor the latter,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], though without any basis in real world research. Critics believe that trying to teach an overall idea without details (facts) is like trying to build a masonry structure without bricks.
Constructivism views learning as a process in which the learner actively constructs or builds new ideas or concepts based upon current and past knowledge. In other words, "learning involves constructing one's own knowledge from one's own experiences." Constructivist learning,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], therefore, is a very personal endeavor, whereby internalized concepts, rules, and general principles may consequently be applied in a practical real-world context. The teacher acts as a facilitator who encourages students to discover principles for themselves and to construct knowledge by working to solve realistic problems. This is also known as knowledge construction as a social process (see social constructivism). We can work to clarify and organize their ideas so we can voice them to others. It gives us opportunities to elaborate on what they learned. We are exposed to the views of others. It enables us to discover flaws and inconsistencies by learning we can get good results. Constructivism itself has many variations,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], such as Active learning,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], discovery learning, and knowledge building. Regardless of the variety,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], constructivism promotes a student's free exploration within a given framework or structure.
3,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Constructivism
1. Behaviorism
Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia © 2001-2008 Wikipedia Contributors (Disclaimer)
This article is licensed under the GNU Free Documentation License,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
Informal learning theory also concerns itself with book vs real-world experience learning. Many consider most schools severely lacking in the second. Newly emerging hybrid instructional models combining traditional classroom and computer enhanced instruction promise the best of both worlds.
Since the Cognitive Revolution of the 1960s and 1970s, learning theory has undergone a great deal of change. Much of the empirical framework of Behaviorism was retained even though a new paradigm was begun. Cognitive theories look beyond behavior to explain brain-based learning. Cognitivists consider how human memory works to promote learning. So for example how the natural physiological processes of encoding information into short term memory and long term memory become important to educators.
The theory of operant conditioning was developed by B.F. Skinner and is known as Radical Behaviorism. The word ‘operant’ refers to the way in which behavior ‘operates on the environment’. Briefly, a behavior may result either in reinforcement, which increases the likelihood of the behavior recurring, or punishment, which decreases the likelihood of the behavior recurring. It is important to note that, a punisher is not considered to be punishment if it does not result in the reduction of the behavior,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and so the terms punishment and reinforcement are determined as a result of the actions. Within this framework, behaviorists are particularly interested in measurable changes in behavior.
By Wikipedia.org
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Educational approaches such as applied behavior analysis, curriculum based measurement, and direct instruction have emerged from this model.
Once memory theories like the Atkinson-Shiffrin memory model and Baddeley's Working memory model were established as a theoretical framework in Cognitive Psychology, new cognitive frameworks of learning began to emerge during the 1970s,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], 80s, and 90s. Today researchers are concentrating on topics like Cognitive load and Information Processing Theory. These theories of learning are very useful as they guide the Instructional design.
Other concerns are the origins of the drive for learning. To this end, many have split off from the mainstream holding that learning is a primarily self taught thing,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and that the ideal learning situation is one that is self taught. According to this dogma, learning at its basic level is all self taught, and class rooms should be eliminated since they do not fit the perfect model of self learning. However, real world results indicate that isolated students fail. Social support seems crucial for sustained learning.
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1) Classical conditioning,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], where the behavior becomes a reflex response to stimulus as in the case of Pavlov's Dogs.
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7,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Drop your portion sizes,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Eating smaller portions will help you to success. If you are dining out for lunch just have a starter or a child’s meal or doggy bag half of your meal. Do not feel you must ‘clean your plate.’
9. Read the label. Always do this when shopping for food, be sure to allow time for this in your shopping program. The first 3 or 4 things on the list will make up the bulk of the content. Look out for: high fructose corn syrup (glucose-fructose in Europe), hydrogenated oil, sugar, salt and bleached flour. These will all boost your calorie intake and provide you with no benefit whatsoever.
10. Congratulate yourself. Don’t forget to give yourself a pat on the back. If you replace a junk food item with a healthy one,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], resist a craving for junk food,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], lose a pound in weight, whatever it is, it is an achievement and should be recognised as such; so shout it from the roof tops. Successful weight loss comes from many such small achievements strung together. You have done well and deserve praise. Stick at it!
2. Commit yourself completely 100%. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that this is it, that you can do this. This is your plan for life. No more yo-yoing of weight on countless different diets. This time you have the right mind set and the right healthy eating plan. There will be a metamorphosis in you; like a butterfly you will emerge.
1. Do not diet. Diets imply a temporary status. Permanent healthy eating is the only way to permanent weight loss. Do not think of starting a diet plan, rather change your life and eating habits so that you no longer need to diet; just eat healthily. You will soon come to love the way a healthy eating plan makes you feel about yourself.
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5,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Colour your plate. Aim to put lots of bright colours on your plate with various fresh vegetables,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. All the colours will ensure there is a wide variety of vitamins and minerals and you are not neglecting the nutrients that your body requires. Veggies are a great source of essential fiber too.
6. Cut out or at least cut down on the fast food. The less you eat of it the more successful you will be,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. It will do you no harm to have an occasional McDonalds and it may help to diminish your cravings if you indulge yourself now and again,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Just make sure it is not too often and say no to the supersize!
8. Beware of salads. Salads in themselves are fine it is what is on them that will do the damage. Many people make the mistake of thinking that they are losing calories by eating salads, which they then smother with mayonnaise and other high fat salad dressings. Avoid mayo, 1 teaspoon packs 100 calories and 11 grams of fat. Use vinaigrette or olive oil.
There are two more tips that should not need mentioning but no weight loss program would work without them,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
4. Drop the designer coffee. A cappuccino coffee will deliver around 150 calories, a frappuccino is twice that amount and sugar is 25 calories per spoon. An Americano will give you 15 calories. Try to reduce and eventually cut out sugar. Ideally it would be better if you could stop or at least reduce consumption of coffee and switch to green tea. This is far more beneficial to your health and can help to metabolise the fat in your body.
3. Cut out alcohol. The occasional drink is ok if you must but if you are a daily drinker then try stopping. Alcohol is a major source of negative calories. 1 pint of beer is 160 calories and cider 200. Wine is 120 calories per glass (small) and spirits are 50 calories a tot, without mixers. In a session you could easily take in your daily food allowance of calories. There is also the ever present danger that alcohol, even small amounts, drastically increases your desire for food and lowers your resistance to junk food.
By ALAN LORD
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Exercise is an absolute must,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Aim for at least half an hour every day or at least do what you can and then build upon it daily. Any form of movement is better than none at all,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
Water. Drink at least half a gallon a day, it has countless benefits.
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It is even said that smoking one cigarette can decrease your lifetime by one minute. So imagine how many minutes have already been cut down from your life after you have smoked several packs a week.

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Laughter is a phenomenal stress relief tool. Laughter is spectacular for so many things. It is a great way for stress relief,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Stress relief comes in many different packages,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Laughter is so much fun,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Why not have fun,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]! Why not laugh,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]! The body doesn’t know if it is a spontaneous laugh or if it is self induced.
This wonderful Indian doctor, Dr Quatary decided to implement a laughter prescription. Every morning a group would meet in the park for a little stress relief. They started by telling each other jokes. After a period of time they ran out of jokes. The doctor then created a new yoga technique mixed with laughter. This was a big success.
It even spilled into the business community. One company starts every morning with a laughing yoga session. This gives a happier work force. Hence, increasing productivity with decrease of tension.
The University of California did a laughter study on a controlled group of people. (They tried it on rats but they just didn’t get it! – Just joking!) They found,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], as a result of laughter, that key stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline decreased. This shows that this is chemical stress relief. This chemical stress relief in turn lets specific immune cell activity increase. Thus boosting the body’s natural killer cells; therefore, being able to radically reduce viruses and tumors cells,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], perhaps killing them off completely.
This is serious stuff. This is serious stress relief. We need to learn to laugh more. Laugh when and at whatever you can and still be polite of course! We as adults are way too serious. Well, there’s one thing we need to be serious about….that is laughter. Have a serious belly laugh at least once a day.
Set a timer for 2 minutes. Ok… lay on your back. In private if you are self conscience. Close your eyes. Start to laugh. Remember, that the body doesn’t know if it is a spontaneous or self induced laugh. Just start laughing. Everyday increase the time a little until you are at a point of around 15 minutes of laughing. Stress relief can be fun. Perhaps it will be so fun that you will want to start your own stress relief club and just laugh your way through it! ?
There have been miracles happen because of laughter,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Cancers have been irradiated,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Ulcers have been healed. General health has increased,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
Laugh? Why not? It’s worth a try. Even if you don’t have any major health ailments,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you could eventually if you don’t laugh. Remember,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], without laughter stress hormones are on the rise. Stress is the cause of many deathly diseases. Let’s turn stress hormones into stress relief. Stress relief such as laughter is vital for survival. So swallow your pride and do some laughter stress relief!
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5. If you find that you are in the wrong,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], admit it. "It’s easier to eat crow while it is still warm." –Dan Heist
1. Be proactive instead of reactive,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. "Good plans shape good decisions. That's why good planning helps to make elusive dreams come true." –Lester R. Bittel
By Doug Staneart
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7. Mend fences whenever possible. "Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it forgoes revenge, and dares forgive an injury." -E.H. Chapin
6. Admit one of your own poor decisions before pointing out a similar error by others. "A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], which is but saying... that he is wiser today than he was yesterday." -Alexander Pope, from Miscellanies by Jonathan Swift
3. Instead of telling people they are wrong, point out mistakes indirectly. "A person convinced against his will is of the same opinion still." –Samuel Butler
4. Look for some type of common ground as soon as possible. "A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece." -Ludwig Erhard
2. Be slow to anger—especially over petty issues,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. "Anger is always more harmful than the insult that caused it." –Chinese Proverb
Conflicts are inevitable,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but the more we know about human nature,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the more positive the outcome of a conflict might be for both parties. We know that different people have different priorities and different ways of dealing with situations that may occur, but in general,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], human beings have certain characteristics that are very similar – even across gender,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], racial, and socio-economic lines.
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· People love to be agreed with.
· People hate to be disagreed with,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
· People like other people who agree with them.
· People dislike other people who disagree with them.
· People who are good at resolving conflicts look for some point of agreement and use good people skills to get others to see a different point of view,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
So if we know that when we disagree with people, we are likely to raise resentment, it might be a good idea to strengthen our soft-skills – our people skills – when dealing with conflicts or potential conflicts. If we find ourselves in a tense situation, and we raise our voice,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the other party is likely to respond in kind. This will usually escalate the situation quickly. Instead, below are SEVEN tips for avoiding and ultimately resolving conflicts.
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The liver is extremely important. It's responsibly for filtering out toxins and waste material from the blood. A badly performing liver makes for a badly performing body and a badly performing body makes for cancer.

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You do have to keep in mind that a food nutrition diary only helps you lose weight if you are scrupulous in maintaining it. There is no point in maintaining it if you are going to cheat,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. Over time you’ll be able to lose a fair amount of weight in a healthy manner,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
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There are a few good reasons why you ought to start maintaining a food nutrition diary,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. They are:
If you are trying to lose weight, you’ll need to watch your food nutrition with a great deal of care. Of course you’ll need to exercise as well but you will only start losing weight if you control your calorie intake. Most weight loss and nutrition experts will tell you that you need to maintain a food diary in order to have a good chance of achieving your goals.
1. You’ll get a precise picture of how much you are eating on a daily basis: Most people have simply no idea about how much food they are eating. In fact,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], eating becomes a habit that is not necessarily related to hunger. It can come as quite a shock to them to see how much food they consume on a daily basis. In addition,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], most dieters underestimate exactly how much they are eating. Besides,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the rule that you can’t change anything you cannot measure applies here. Once you write down everything you have eaten then you’ll be able to calculate the number of calories you have consumed in a day.
2. You’ll notice any particular eating patterns that are sabotaging your diet: Most dieters are able to maintain their diet for a good part of the day but give in to temptation once in a while. In fact,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], many people have a particular time of the day when they really need a snack. If you write down exactly what you eat and at what time of the day then you’ll be able to take preventive measures. For instance,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], if you eat cookies or chips in the afternoon then you should keep a bowl of chopped fruit handy so that you don’t ruin your diet.
3. You can put a stop to deviations from your diet: If you notice that you haven’t stuck to your food nutrition plan for a day then you can immediately make amends by having a low-calorie meal. Besides,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the very fact that you have to write down everything you eat helps you exercise control over yourself.
By Stella Meed
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What you eat and what you do can influence your hormones dramatically. When this happens you can either gain weight or lose weight. Avoid these key areas to make sure you lose weight with your healthy weight loss diet.

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If there is one thing most traditional dieters have in common,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is a look of sheer starvation on their faces. They stare longingly at anything anyone else is eating, walk around with their stomachs grumbling and maybe even appear to lack energy, rounding out their emaciated or wannabe emaciated image.
By Alexander Sharp
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Pay Attention To What Is Consumed
This is not the best way to diet. The fact of the matter is any plan or crash diet that fosters a feeling of starvation is probably going to backfire. Sure, the dieter will lose a few pounds on the front end. Once the crash course is over, however,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the pounds are likely to come back with a vengeance. Diets that promote skipping meals or entire food groups simply are not healthy and they can lead to a ping-pong effect when it comes to weight loss.
Why do people try them?
Trying to lose weight with a starvation plan will provide some results, but chances are high they will not last. There are plenty of smart,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], healthy choices dieters can make that will promote lasting results. Learning more about healthy living can help anyone with a true desire to lose get the results they want.
There is a better way to go,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. It is possible to lose weight without starving and even promote weight loss that lasts. Try these things instead of the latest fad:
It all comes down to the short-term victories. Tightly controlled starvation diets can produce big results quickly. They will, however,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], hit a plateau rather fast and leave followers in the lurch.
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Many nutritional experts recommend changing habits rather than using crash diets. With this in mind,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is a very good idea to pay attention to the foods consumed throughout the day. It is all too easy to start out on the right foot and then blow it by snacking late in the evening. Keep meals steady,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], avoid unhealthy snacks and try to stay on track.
With any lifestyle change it’s a good idea to expect some slips though. Be prepared for them and just get right back on track if they happen. Do remember that an occasional piece of pie or an ice cream cone is not the end of the world. These treats, however,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], should be seen as just that.
Smaller,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], healthier meals and snacks spread out through the course of the day can prime the metabolism for calorie burning while fostering a sense of being full that lasts. Start out with breakfast and make sure to eat at least three meals and two snacks moving forward. Remember that meals and snacks should be small, light and healthy.
Change Up Food Choices
A good weight loss diet will involve healthy food choices that truly fuel the body. It will not involve skipping out on entire food groups unless there is a medical reason to do so. With this in mind,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is often best to use the diet time to start adopting better lifestyle choices. Start with substituting the foods that are normally eaten for lower calorie, higher nutritional value options. For example, give up white rice or potatoes for whole grain rice. Switch out fried foods for broiled, baked or grilled. Go with fresh or steamed veggies whenever possible. Creative substitutions can make a big difference.
Eat More Regularly
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What you eat and what you do can influence your hormones dramatically. When this happens you can either gain weight or lose weight. Avoid these key areas to make sure you lose weight with your healthy weight loss diet.

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By Tommy Wayne,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]
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Approach mainstream lenders and they’ll turn you away if the credit score is poor,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. It’s different with Blacklisted Loans though and a poor credit rating doesn’t necessarily affect the outcome,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
If you need cash for a new car,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], home improvements or financial emergencies Blacklisted Loans could provide the solution. Don’t think your application will fail the moment a credit check is done because Blacklisted Loans don’t work like that. Companies that provide Blacklisted Loans look at your financial status,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], they evaluate if you can afford to make the repayments before making their final decision.
How to apply for Bad Credit Loans
Think your credit rating has got to be whiter than white before you can apply for new loans? That’s simply not the case. Even if your credit rating is poor you can still apply for Bad Credit Loans and receive Blacklisted Loans for whatever purpose you have in mind. Blacklisted Loans are available for people that might have trouble finding finance through the normal lenders,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], so even if you have a poor credit rating there’s a chance you can still take out a loan through specialist companies.
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Not everyone has an impeccable credit history and companies that specialise in Blacklisted Loans fully understand this fact,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. They look at the bigger picture when it comes to Blacklisted Loans and base their decision on other factors apart from credit checks,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
As long as they can see you can easily afford the repayments there’s no reason why they shouldn’t approve the Blacklisted Loans even if you have a less than impeccable credit rating,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
I’ll fall at the first hurdle when applying for Bad Credit Loans
Applying for Blacklisted Loans is easy,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you simply choose the amount that you’d like to borrow then complete a short application form. The company who specialises in Blacklisted Loans will do a quick credit check and they’ll ask you for recent payslips and bank statements from the last 3 months. This enables them to see how much of a risk you are and whether you can realistically afford to pay the Blacklisted loans back or whether you would struggle to make the repayments in the future.
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Of course there are exceptions to the above statement. If you work in a loud environment or teach, coach, or train in a large room, then you will certainly need to speak in a volume greater than Level 1.

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Small businesses, those with less than 50 employees,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], are really taking off. In January, 2012, for instance, 95,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych],000 employees were hired by small businesses. When compared with large businesses, or those that have more than 500 employees,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this is highly significant considering that large businesses only hired 3,000 in January, 2012. With all of these new employees coming in to work for small businesses,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it is surprising that so many small business owners put off running background checks on their employees.
Background checks are actually legally required in some instances but for small business owners, if the background checks are not required, they may feel they are not necessary. This couldn’t be further from truth actually and as can be seen above, can be very dangerous. The most common reason that small business owners do not perform background checks is due to cost. Typically these background checks will cost less than $50 and that can be a great investment when you realize that the $50 you spend finding out the background information on a potential employee could literally save you millions,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], as well as keep your company,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], other employees and yourself safe.
The truth is,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], when you neglect doing background checks on a potential employee, you may be opening the door to potential issues, which could literally devastate a small business. There are stories every week of employees who were never put through background checks committing crimes against other employees or the business itself. The majority of these individuals already have criminal backgrounds,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], yet they were hired anyway because the small business owner had no idea of what the individuals past was like. When a crime happens, for example a shooting in the workplace, when all is said and done, can cost a small business owner millions of dollars and likely close the business permanently.
Though many small business owners are not doing background checks at all, others are attempting to do them on their own. This isn’t really the best idea either as there are likely legal issues that could pop up with this. Though there are public records that are available for small business owners to check,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this is a timely process and there are laws in all states that restrict the type of information you can use when making hiring decisions. If you are doing your own background checks without any legal assistance, you are probably breaking the law which could be equally as costly as a crime being committed in the workplace. Again,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in this situation, the $50 or less you would spend on a professional background check firm really pales in comparison to a lawsuit brought against you and your company by a potential hire for performing a background check incorrectly.
As a small business owner, you can surely see the surface benefits of performing background checks on potential employees. There are hidden benefits as well, such as hiring the highest quality people,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], reducing employee dishonesty, avoiding negative publicity, and lowering employee turnover. Find a good background check firm today and start getting the benefits of performing background checks on potential hires.
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By Stuart Nance
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Today, customers and clients are hard to get but they can be so easy and quick to lose. One small thing could go wrong and maybe you didn't even see it. The next thing you know, or even worse you don't know, and you have lost a high paying client for good.

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Kenny is by far a different character; his love is cars however he still completely loves indulging in nature throughout the countless camping weekends his mother and father organise close to the sea,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. I felt he would choose a ride in a Lotus or Lamborghini but finally he opted for a scuba diving experience encouraged by shipwreck diving programmes he’d seen on television.
I gave over the mouse control to the kids and naturally within just minutes they had found a site at which you could pick numerous sorts of kids’ things to do as gifts or perhaps buy a pre-payment slip and permit the kids choose for themselves,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. I became quite bogged down with the quantity and selection of the items on offer; there was a gentle trek with a pony or handling owls for any bird fans,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]; under-cover sky-diving or go-karting for the slightly more bold sorts or careering around a racetrack in a performance vehicle for the genuine trainee adrenaline junkies,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
For a good choice of outdoor activities to do with children take a look at My Outdoor Store, the premier walking and hiking outdoor gear store.
I don’t think the children had ever come across anything similar to it previously so, having trawled through all of the website in great detail I told them both to pick what would be their most favourite activity. Although they are twins they have rather distinct personalities so I expected very dissimilar answers,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but was still amazed at their choices. Phil is the quieter studious one and enjoys anything at all to do with the outdoors and animals; however I got a surprise when he chose the indoor sky-diving, his reason being that he wanted to experience what it was like to fly like a bird so that he might understand them greater.
I’ve identified that this is the best approach to enjoy the company of young people – use the principle of filling their brains with expensive plans and then give them back to their parents to pay for it all!
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Clutching at straws I recalled my own childhood wet afternoon activities, but my proposed “game of Ludo or cards” was met with wry looks of scorn. Now whilst I've got a laptop,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I don’t own any games or software on it likely to entertain a couple of twelve-year-old boys,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], so I proposed we take a peek on the web for experiences that a modern day child might consider to pass an afternoon (not necessarily a damp one).
Being a regular hiker and outdoor type I imagined that the perfect solution to pass the time would be an amble through the community nature reserve with binoculars to see what animals and birds we could identify. Once the allotted time dawned though the heavens had opened,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the lengthy showers being so hard that my modest adventure was completely washed out. Because this ended up being a last minute arrangement the boys hadn’t arrived with something with which to entertain themselves,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], so not surprisingly it was a situation of “what can we do Uncle Bruno?”
By Bruno Blackstone
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Just lately I did a little favour for a good old friend of mine; he had promised to take care of his two grandchildren for a day, completely forgetting that he had a clinic appointment to keep. As the appointment was simply a follow-up one and wasn't going to be long I volunteered to look after the boys whilst he was away. Because I live adjacent to the clinic it was easier for him to bring the boys around to my house,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], they were quite grown up enough to take in the situation and they know me very well as we have met before on several occasions.
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There are many factors to consider when giving presents. It should always be appropriate for the occasion. The nature of the gift, its practicality, its price, its wrapper and presentation can also make a difference.

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Hidden for centuries under a shroud of judgment and misidentification, the real truth is that both masculine and feminine energy are potentially powerful and noble, and both are necessary. To allow femininity its full, authentic expression, to honor the qualities of feminine for what they truly are, to embrace the feminine essence as a resource, to celebrate femininity as a gift is to be human, to be whole, to be healed. We just need to hear femininity in a new way.
“I forgive myself for judging myself and women as having no sense of self. The truth is I am the Self.”
In late September, 1966,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], right after my second birthday, my mother rejected the role for woman that she had be raised to fulfill. She divorced my father and moved us several hundred miles away. She went back to school, first completing her B.A., then her Masters’ Degree, and finally, got her Ph.D. in 1980. She always worked at least two jobs until I was a sophomore in high school.
What’s your reaction? Did I insult you? Do you feel like you messed up or got too emotional? Do you feel the urge to distance yourself from this label, to be ANYTHING BUT a girl?
Now, breathe.
I turned my anger toward my husband and directed lots of judgments against him. That he was a “trophy” husband, who looked good and contributed little to supporting the family, that he was weak, that he gave in easily, couldn’t stand up to pressure, that he was flighty, spaced out, not able to think effectively or problem solve, and one day, with a divorce pending,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], as I was in a counseling session listing everything I “hated” about my husband, I started to notice something. Trophy. Weak. Only worthy if gorgeous. Flighty. Undependable. Dumb. Poor without a provider. Every one of these was a judgment I had unconsciously held against women, against femininity, and as a result, against myself. I wrote them down. One, by one, I listed nearly 40 judgments.
Manly: syn. bold, brave, confident, daring, dauntless, dignified, fearless, firm, gallant, heroic, powerful, resolute, robust, self-reliant, strong, undaunted, vigorous, virile.
“I forgive myself for judging myself and women and ‘feminine’ as flighty, the truth is women are the roots of every family tree.
I got my first period at age 14 in 1978. The same year the push to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment peaked in momentum before tumbling into oblivion. During this era, the feminist movement put a lot of emphasis on demonstrating parity between women and men, arguing that women can and should do anything men can do, the same way as men, and even better than men.
And I quote:
Outwardly, women have progressed socially, economically, and many have, by law, attained the basic natural rights to life, liberty and property afforded to our brothers for centuries. Yet no matter how much we act as if the world has changed, women are still, as Alice Walker put it, “the niggers of the world.” For no matter how far we progress in improving our outer circumstances, we are growing, working, loving, living and dying in a context where femininity is held with contempt, disrespect, and fear.
In child development, gender roles are most profoundly defined during adolescence. Each adolescent girl looks for clues to figure out what it means to be a woman. What is it to behave “womanly?” How are women different from men?
Language is powerful. Word is law. In our culture, the association of femaleness with weakness and other undesirable traits is so pervasive, we don’t even notice it. It is in the media, it is in our language, it is even in Roget’s Thesaurus.
It&#8217,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];s no wonder women viewed the path to power as adopting more “masculine” qualities.
To exhibit the quality “feminine” as it exists in our language was bound to engender a patronizing, untrusting response. To get ahead in a man’s world, women chose to embrace the defining qualities of “masculine”, so we rejected “soft, twisty and weak” and took on “daring,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], strong and undaunted”.
My mother worked very hard to make it, and she did. I was proud of her, and at the same time, I felt alone, unprotected, and confused. My mother’s life was hard. My life was lonely. I wanted my mother to be home when I got home, and I wanted her to bake cookies for me.
Masculinity: syn. Virility, potency, vigor, gentlemanly, cock, stud.
Whatever it meant to be “womanly,” I knew I didn’t want my mother’s experience. I also knew that the Reagan-Era reactionary backlash that was attempting to guilt women back into housewifery was not for me either.
And ultimately to cherish myself.
§
I was jealous of my friends who had stay-at-home moms, yet I felt disdain for women who were “dependent” on men and stayed home with the kids.
As I moved through adolescence, I tended to choose male friends over females. My select female friends I viewed as more like the boys, i.e. athletic, bright, and career-bound. I had no time or interest for “girly-girls” who I perceived as shallow, superficial, and dumb.
For me, coming of age in the mid-1970s and early ‘80s meant rejecting anything that seemed too “feminine,” i.e. weak, prissy, not to be taken seriously. After all, to be “female” is to be moody, unreliable, and vacuous (vacuous means stupid,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], sweetie).
As a woman, I had denied my female essence. I was pretending to be an empowered woman while rejecting being “feminine.” I had always known myself to be a “feminist,” yet I pretended that my masculine qualities were what helped me be successful. The result was I felt angry and exhausted. I undervalued the women in my life. I looked to men to give me a sense of value, wholeness and worth. I only considered masculine qualities admirable. I never even looked to find qualities of femaleness that I could admire.
Let me give you an example.
Do you hear the qualities of an effective leader? Does this describe an equal partner or a valued friend,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]?
“You play like a girl!”
Let’s go back to Roget’s Thesaurus and look at another descriptive term for the feminine: Womanly.
We called the movement Feminism, but it would have been more aptly named Masculinism because it perpetuated the worship of masculine qualities and the degradation of the feminine. The feminist movement was and still is acting under the supposition that masculine qualities were more desirable, more reliable, and more powerful.
Let’s check out manly.
I read the list, over and over, and the more I read it, the more I questioned. Where did I get these ideas? Not from my experience, I was certain. It was as if someone had been at my bedside, since the day I was born, whispering in my ear while I slept until I believed I was hearing my own thoughts. “Womanly means weak” seemed as if it were a fact. I never questioned it, I never even heard it. It was just there, like the sound of my own breath.
For my mother and her mother the expectations for women’s behavior were longstanding and obvious: marry, defer to the husband, have babies, care for families, and keep a warm, orderly and loving home. Being feminine clearly and overtly lined up with being “sensitive, soft, and reproductive.”
In our efforts to fit in and succeed in a “man’s world,” we pretended the key to power is to become more “manly.” Becoming manly women has helped us in many ways. There are more women executives, more women in Congress,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], more women earning salaries equal to or above their male partners. But no matter how many job promotions we get, we are still living under the tyranny of the language. Femininity is still heard the same way it has been since before women had the right to vote.
In the late 1970s and early 80s, women declared new social roles and expectations for themselves. The role of the modern woman appeared to be dramatically different than the 1950s and early 60s. I was encouraged to get an education and be career minded. Young women, like men, were taught to work for financial independence first; then see to the roles of spouse and parent.
Here’s a suggestion for the next edition of Roget&#8217,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];s Thesaurus.
Armed with these realizations, I began to forgive myself for each and every judgment and come up with an affirmation of the truth.
“A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.&#8221,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];—Unknown
Compare that to Roget’s description of the male gender.
Femininity continues to be shunned, degraded and considered a quality that is not to be trusted. As feminists, we not only failed to promote the authentic feminine, we abandoned it, creating fragmentation inside ourselves and distance from each other.
“I forgive myself for judging myself and women and ‘feminine’ as ‘victim’: The truth is, I create my experience and have infinite power to heal.”
Femininity: syn. abundant, accepting, attentive, benevolent,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], compassionate, cooperative, creative, earthy, embracing, expansive, flexible, flowing, grounding, healing, life giving, loving, nurturing, protective, radiant, receptive, resilient, resourceful, succulent, tolerant, unifying, wellspring, wild, wise.
“I forgive myself for judging myself and women and ‘feminine’ as back stabbing: The truth is women are embracing.”
What happens to your body language? Do you sit up straight and get a “stiff upper lip”? Do you sense an opportunity to be strong and honorable?
By Robin Hoffman
See all Articles by Robin HoffmanSee Robin Hoffman's Expert PageGet Updates on Women's IssuesGet Updates on Robin Hoffman Average: 0 Your rating: None Tweet
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“Take it like a man!”
Femininity: syn. Sissiness, prissiness, weaker sex, bitch, slut, doll, chick, kittenish, maidenly, soft, chicken.
Womanly: syn. changeable, delicate, modest, reproductive, sensitive, shy, soft, tender, twisty, vixenish, weak.
Now, that’s the guy we want! Give him the key to the executive washroom.
Try this one on:
“I forgive myself for judging myself and women as conniving. The truth is women create in flow.”
The clue to how this works, and the key to transforming it, is in the language. How we “hear” the terms for feminine: female, girl, womanly, directs our interpretation instantaneously, and we relate to the idea based on our internalized notions of what feminine means. It is not our logical mind that responds to those words, it is our conditioned mind and our emotions that immediately call up specific impressions.
Growing up, I dreamed of a life where I would “have it all.” I wanted to be an independent career woman, a wife and a mom who would be home with my kids after school. How to do it came to me like an epiphany in a catchy jingle from a popular perfume company, “I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never, never, never let you forget you’re a man, ‘cause I’m a woman!” That was it. The answer was so clear: all I had to do to have it all was to do it all.
And so I did. I got married, built a successful business, had two kids, nursed them both for a total of 28 months, kept up a great body, had an active marital sex life, and put a homemade dinner on the table most nights. It worked great,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], except by the time I was 36 years old, I was exhausted, drained and dried up. I shared with a friend that I felt like a giant nipple. I was feeding everyone in my life but me. The map that I thought would lead to a fulfilling and happy life had led to a dead end. I had created a situation where everyone depended on me, no one was allowed to contribute to me, and I was parched and pissed.
With each reframe, I could feel myself soften inside begin to appreciate, embrace and cherish other women.
I came home to an empty apartment most days after school. My mother would arrive around 6:00 in the evening and cook dinner for us. I could hear her typing for hours after I went to bed, and she got up before dawn most mornings.
“I forgive myself for judging myself and women as clueless, the truth is we hold within us all the wisdom of the universe!”
If I lacked evidence of this in my personal environment, there were plenty of examples in the media. Beautiful women without position or power were like Crissy,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the bubble headed blonde on the popular TV sitcom Three’s Company. Women with power got it from their husbands and then abused it. Like the wicked Alex on Dynasty, strong, smart women were portrayed as wielding power underhandedly and getting what they want by being sneaky, seductive, manipulative and backstabbing. The women who have claim to “legitimate power,” who are successful in their own right and upfront about what they want, are labeled as “bitchy” e.g. Barbara Streisand and Madonna.
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